6 Tips to Spark Meaningful Conversations During the Holidays
The holidays are a great time for forging new connections and strengthening old ones. Whether it is around the dinner table or at the company Christmas party, you need to know how to set the stage to have a meaningful conversation. This can enhance the quality of your relationships, and can be practiced all year long.
If you want to spark a meaningful conversation in the upcoming holiday season, here are six key tips to help you do it with ease.
1. Learn the Art of Asking Questions
The best way to spark a meaningful conversation is to become fully immersed in what is being said. You can do this by learning to ask great questions, listening carefully to the answers, and then following up with thoughtful additional questions. Asking thoughtful questions causes people to be heard, and feel valued. This is especially true when you are truly interested in the responses to your question.
Some people are naturally gifted at asking questions. If you feel as though you could improve in this area, then Google “great questions”, or search Amazon for books on the subject. Everyone can learn to be an interesting conversationalist, and the easiest way to do this is by asking thoughtful, interesting questions, and then listening intently for the answers.
2. Do Your Homework
If you know that you are going to see extended family over the holidays, prepare for what you will discuss around the dinner table. With the rise of social media, most people post tons of great details about what they have been up to over the past few months.
Ask relevant questions about things you read on social media like recent trips they took, the promotion they received, and the milestones their children have achieved. You don’t have to let them know that you looked them up before the get-together. Simply ask questions that they seem happy to talk about online, giving them an opportunity to share whatever they feel inclined to share.
3. Get Personal
While you may not want to ask questions that are too personal upon meeting someone for the first time (or for the first time in a while), you do want to get a little personal. Try not to feel so formal and professional in your interactions. Make appropriate jokes, laugh a little, and take the time to truly get to know the other person.
It will put both of you at ease and lead to much more engaging conversations. Of course, it goes without saying that you should make sure jokes are appropriate for the audience before you make them.
4. Don’t Exclude People
One of the most helpful tips for having meaningful conversations this holiday season is simply to include as many people as you can. Be mindful of people who are standing around or sitting on their own. Instead of zeroing in on your current conversation with laser-like focus, remember to be kind and extend the conversation to those who may not be as comfortable joining in.
5. Let Pride Take a Backseat
If you haven’t seen your friends and family for a little while, you might be eager to share how well things are going for you. It is beyond easy to get swept up at the moment and to allow your pride to dominate the conversation. Instead, try to focus on the achievements of others during a conversation. Connect with them and celebrate their accomplishments before you celebrate your own.
While that doesn’t mean that you have to hide how well you are doing, it does mean you should focus on others more than yourself. You will have far more meaningful talks and will certainly learn more, to the extent you focus on those around you rather than on yourself.
6. Engage in Active Listening
For many people, it is easy to become distracted while listening to someone talk about what is going on in their life. Resist the temptation to give in to these distractions and instead practice your active listening skills. This means making eye contact, turning your body language toward them, and giving them the space that they need to continue sharing with you.
Demonstrate that you are interested in what they are saying by nodding along, asking follow-up questions, and otherwise encouraging them to continue speaking. People will feel genuinely heard and understood when you engage with these active listening skills. These skills are the hallmark of a great leader.
If you want to connect more deeply to your friends and family this holiday season, you need to know how to have meaningful conversations. These talks set the stage to deepen relationships, and they do not require much work on your part. Simply be present and do what feels natural to express your interest in what your loved ones and others around you have to say!
